Willow House support group--night one

C and I were impressed with the group last night...and I hope/think we found *a fit*. Not a real fan to be a part of this type of club now, but these people have lived/survived the same loss we have and together we will somehow help each other get through.

The small parent/child loss group consisted of a moderator from the Willow House (who I think lost her husband) a women who lost her son 3-4 years ago--very rare leukemia that they had no idea he had until he was gone--happened suddenly in one day; A women, who is a new volunteer, who lost her one year old child in '92 or so in an accident with a sitter-- scalding water or something similar, and then a couple who, when the husband/Craig, began to tell their story, sounded so close to what we've experienced I began to immediately cry. He and Jacki lost their 9 year old daughter Ema in her sleep just this past March and the Dr.’s. still don't know why. She had began taking some anti-biotic for something--not serous, felt like she wanted to sleep by herself, instead of in her room as she always did with her sister and her mom found her gone the next morning...no outward signs of illness the days before. They are so comforted that her sister did not find her in the morning. So we began to find an immediate connection: newly grieving couple, of a young girl from a death of unknown reasons, living just 2 miles away in a neighborhood we looked at before we added on to our place. They seemed so strong as they spoke about it, were as we are still crying at every word we speak. They told their story of kind support from a total stranger in the days following the funeral, who happens to be the other woman in attendance who lost her child 3-4 years ago/leukemia---they are of course no longer strangers. All spoke of how each person/couple feels compelled to help the next get through it. They spoke of another couple who was not there last night, but had a similar young child loss, that we hope to meet. The moderator, who only says enough to keep conversations going on a certain topic, will be a snow bird for the next few months, but has stated that the other moderator will be returning from Israel, will be back next month.

In the hour and a half, we spoke about how we are getting along through the holidays, how some have gotten through the first year of firsts w/o...first b'day, holidays, anniversary etc. Very helpful to hear others speak of the process. I know we will gain insight and strength from this group but I hope we can also provide for others as well.

We exchanged cards at the conclusion and Craig asked me if I was downtown and I said yes, and that it appeared his office was not far from mine...he immediately says 'maybe we can meet at the Berghoff'---well, those who know me, know that's a great German place to gather in the loop and one of my favorite lunch spots--the stand-up bar. C has come down the last few years for my b'day to enjoy/celebrate lunch there with me...I'd intended to have her start bringing Christine next year...I will always regret not being able to take her there along with a long list of other things I wanted to do with her---that's for another long blog.

So, in short, we hope to continue to attend these meetings monthly...thanks to Donna and John for passing on the word about Willow House.