Bring in the Veterans (of Hope)

This week, C and I had separately planned to meet with people who’ve lost a child…not knowing the details of their loss and without even knowing it, we were to meet with veterans of this sorrowful club.

C went to visit Angie (whom we’ve never met before), who lost her 4-year old son Mark over 15 years ago. It was recommended to us, by three different people that we speak to her. Friday (the 13th), I met with Mark, a business colleague whom I’ve known for almost 9 years, who lost his infant son Nathan over 15 years ago as well. Since I’ve mostly only had a business relationship with Mark, I did not know of his loss. He volunteered to meet and chat with me right after Christine died.

I can’t speak for C, but from what she told me, it sounds like her talk with Angie was worth while. Both shared the details of their loss, both cried…both may have gotten strength and hope from each other.

I met Mark at EPI (local watering hole), and again, I’m meeting someone with no real agenda other than sharing sorrow. What I got from Mark was much more than just sharing of sorrow. Again, like meeting with Craig, the 2 hour conversation went from one subject to the next with some tangents and probably many interruptions from me –reaffirming that YES, that’s happened or is happening to me and here’s my story.

We shared the details of our loss that sorrowful day, but mostly Mark shared with me HOPE. He spoke of how he’s in a different place of sorrow than I am and that there will be a better day. He spoke of the many times he’s comforted others who’ve had a very ill child or lost a child or spouse. Most importantly, he spoke of how his faith in the Lord has grown and how he has witnessed his faith to others. He spoke of how he first attended a w/e retreat through his church. A fellow participant noted to him that he did not seem to be too affected by the sorrowful witnessing by others…little did they know that he had experienced the worst sorrow event of all and that to the bereaved parent all other pains pale in comparison. Mark eventually attended another w/e retreat as a speaker. He was asked to speak on the humanization of Jesus…why was he put on earth to experience life as one of us. As part of this talk, he recalled his pain of loosing Nathan. The way he tied it all together was beautiful and since I won’t do it justice here…enough said.

Mark also spoke of how important it is to not wallow in the comfort of pain—it can overtake you and how to focus on maintaining a good and open relationship with my wife.

Both Angie and Mark are veterans of this club we’ve joined – we appreciate their insight, the time they took out of their own busy lives, but especially we appreciate the though of HOPE.

PS: image from images.com---one of the first that came up for Hope...